Forgive

I cannot explain what an amazing experience Honduras was. I knew it was pretty awesome at the time, but now that I’m home… Every day I am reminded of how profound that experience has been and will hopefully continue to be on my life. I went with the hopes of helping others, but those very ones that I went to help ended up helping me.

During my stay there, God made me aware of some things in my life that need to be adjusted. I also realized that there are some things that I haven’t completely forgiven and let go of. Earlier this week, I had a conversation via email about forgiveness. I spoke my heart and received some words from a dear friend that were sort of hard to swallow, but were what I needed to hear. I was reminded that if we hold anger and resentment in, it will be like cancer to our hearts. I was also told that we have to forgive if we want to move forward.

I had some crazy dreams last night; very violent dreams. It involved two different groups of people. One hated the other. In my dream, I could see the activities and hear the words of both groups. I watched as the one group filled with hatred went to hunt the other group who seemed like a very gentle people. The cruel group tormented the group that were considered outcasts, simply because they were a little different. First, they set the house next door on fire with the animals inside. The people of that home were off in the fields working. Then they went to the house with people and children inside. I won’t go into the details of that part. It was such an awful, vivid dream.

I know you’re probably wondering where I’m going with this. I don’t blame you. When I awoke from that dream, I thought about Jesus. I thought about the torture He went through. He too was hunted, tortured, and killed. I got up and got ready for work. On the way to work I heard a song. I had Casting Crowns in the CD player and “Blessed Redeemer” came on.

“Up Calvary's mountain one dreadful morn
Walked Christ my Savior, weary and worn
Facing for sinners, death on the cross
That He might save them from endless loss

"Father, forgive them," my Savior prayed
 Even while His lifeblood flowed fast away
 Praying for sinners while in such woe
 No one but Jesus ever loved so

Blessed Redeemer, precious Redeemer
Seems now I see Him on Calvary's tree
Wounded and bleeding, for sinners pleading
Blind and unheeding, dying for me”

When I was reminded of what all Jesus went through… They stripped Him. They placed a crown of thorns upon His head. They mocked Him and spit on Him. The tortured and tormented Him. Isaiah 53:5 says, “But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed”. Jesus knew everything that was about to befall Him. Can you imagine the pain He endured? We cry over a paper cut, but Jesus had nails driven through his body and was speared in the side (for us). The pain is unimaginable. Still, He knew all of that was coming and what did He do? The Bible says, “Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do” – Luke 23:34. He forgave them!

So my final and main thought is this: If Jesus could forgive all of that, surely we (this includes me) can forgive those who have hurt us. I know some of us have deep wounds that we’ve hidden in a dark place that others don’t even know about. Perhaps we were hurt in a childhood. Maybe something major happened in your life within the last week, last month, or within the year. It doesn’t matter when things happened, the instructions are the same; we must forgive. 1 Kings 8:50 says, “And forgive thy people that have sinned against thee, and all their transgressions wherein they have transgressed against thee, and give them compassion before them who carried them captive, that they may have compassion on them”. My constant prayer is to become more like Him. If I am to do that, I must forgive as He did. Not only must I forgive, but I must also show those people compassion. I won’t just do it for them or so I can be healed of the hurt that still lingers in my heart; I will find a way to do it for Him.